@edwardcilestia's post on Artfol
Welcome to my stash of art!Sorry for not posting lately, I promise to post some art again soon! I haven't tried out the writing and questions feature here yet and I thought I'd try it out for some advice on a personal struggle of mine.
I noticed so many users here are very open minded or memebers of the lgbtq+(or both!) so I feel safer writing this, but I am a trans man who struggles greatly with needles, blood, and hospitals... over the years I have developed a phobia of hospitals and I am prone to faint at the sight of blood and even the smell of medical equipment (like alcohol wipes and saline). It's been 5 years since I've come out and officially started T, I have had a few transitional surgeries but am not finished (I have more planned for the fall), but unfortunately I have had to restart taking T several times now for various different medical and financial reasons, forcing me to restart back on T over and over again.
I apologize for the length of this post and appreciate anyone who has read up until this point, but for those who wish to skip to the question you should start reading here.
My question is this: What are some ways I can better tolerate my T injections?
I do not give them to myself (I have fainted trying to do so in the past), I use a fairly thick needle (not by choice, the amount of T I take requires a thicker needle, but it is quite painful and typically sends me into a panic attack), I alternate between both of my arms and recieve my injections in the back of my arm so I can't see (not seeing or knowing when the injection will happen helps keep me from fighting it), and my boyfriend is the one who gives me my injections and he's been trained to do so as well... my issue is I know I want T in my system, before I had to restart I was so much happier with it in me, but whenever I face injections I get this surge of anxiety and panic that just makes me lose control and either fight it or faint. I've tried distractions like music and tv or breathing exercises, but I still struggle a lot with staying still long enough to get the injection and I've even missed a few injections here and there because I can't seem to control my fear... does anyone have advice that might help? I am pretty much open to trying anything at this point, the only thing I can't do is switch from injections to a different source of T even though I wish very dearly I could.
Even if you do not have advice or commentary on the subject, I thank you very much for reading... I think this was at least soothing to put my thoughts into words.Apr 26, 2021
I noticed so many users here are very open minded or memebers of the lgbtq+(or both!) so I feel safer writing this, but I am a trans man who struggles greatly with needles, blood, and hospitals... over the years I have developed a phobia of hospitals and I am prone to faint at the sight of blood and even the smell of medical equipment (like alcohol wipes and saline). It's been 5 years since I've come out and officially started T, I have had a few transitional surgeries but am not finished (I have more planned for the fall), but unfortunately I have had to restart taking T several times now for various different medical and financial reasons, forcing me to restart back on T over and over again.
I apologize for the length of this post and appreciate anyone who has read up until this point, but for those who wish to skip to the question you should start reading here.
My question is this: What are some ways I can better tolerate my T injections?
I do not give them to myself (I have fainted trying to do so in the past), I use a fairly thick needle (not by choice, the amount of T I take requires a thicker needle, but it is quite painful and typically sends me into a panic attack), I alternate between both of my arms and recieve my injections in the back of my arm so I can't see (not seeing or knowing when the injection will happen helps keep me from fighting it), and my boyfriend is the one who gives me my injections and he's been trained to do so as well... my issue is I know I want T in my system, before I had to restart I was so much happier with it in me, but whenever I face injections I get this surge of anxiety and panic that just makes me lose control and either fight it or faint. I've tried distractions like music and tv or breathing exercises, but I still struggle a lot with staying still long enough to get the injection and I've even missed a few injections here and there because I can't seem to control my fear... does anyone have advice that might help? I am pretty much open to trying anything at this point, the only thing I can't do is switch from injections to a different source of T even though I wish very dearly I could.
Even if you do not have advice or commentary on the subject, I thank you very much for reading... I think this was at least soothing to put my thoughts into words.Apr 26, 2021
#question
#lgbtq
#rant
Comments
Unfortunately, I don’t have any advice, but I wanted to let you know I’m very proud of you and rooting for you every step of the way 
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•It might be worth letting your doctor know you're having this issue, it's quite common so I bet they deal with that sort of phobia all the time (especially now with vaccinations!) They might be able to recommend therapy like CBT that would help 
it's always worth seeking help from a professional if you are struggling to manage by yourself
it's always worth seeking help from a professional if you are struggling to manage by yourself•
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